drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Randomize
