we're chasing vodka with high fives
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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