Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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