Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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