He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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