What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Randomize
