is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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