I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize