I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
