atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Randomize
