Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
Duck Duck Cougar?
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
