ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
