We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
