You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Randomize