Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
another moral hangover. fuck.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
