Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
