butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
No subtext here. People are naked.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
