so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize