Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
He felt like a one man threesome
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Randomize
