Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
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