i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
