Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
