What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
