I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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