So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
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