Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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