You're so nebulous sometimes
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize