im gay
i know
yea but for you.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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