You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
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