And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
