I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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