And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
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