I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize