Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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