Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
