My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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