Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
