If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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