Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Randomize
