Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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