Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
So much Jack, so little girl.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Randomize