Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Randomize
