i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
they need to just BURY HIM!
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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