There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
