I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize