guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Randomize