Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Randomize
