garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Randomize