Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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