I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
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