go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
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